If I were President, I’d have NASA come up with a plan to destroy the Moon … and then Mars.
If I were President, I’d sell waffles at the White House, and make 40 bucks a plate.
If I were President, I’d eat pastry bread and cover it in cheese and pickle brine … and then add the sardines.
If I were President, I’d build shrunket-tanks and arm all sides with them … these tanks would be made of old steel and dead elk and smell of stripper snatches, cigarettes and stale beer …
And you’ll buy them, armed with vulcan canon that fire 12 gauge mixed rounds.
If I was President of the USA?
I’d sponsor a national stripper day …
We’d have strippers, up and DOWN WA DC …
Covered in hooker grease and spizz oil, with their boovulas torgating …
(and then I’d realize)
“This is like any other day …”