Christmas is about hope and love and peace … and wishing for stuff. People wish for new dogs and softer logs … they wish for some NICE ACTION from SHARON across the street, the one with the BIG JUGS.
You ever wish?
You could become a STAR SOLDIER, riding through space, somewhere on the edge of the solar system – moving swiftly through the darkness in your star cruiser, the SLOGORN … you could have become a BIG STAR on the porn circuit, but instead you joined up to fight the scourge of the mold people from Quadrant-6-YANKEE … you ever think about that?
“If AI were real? – it wouldn’t be ‘stealing missile codes’. It would be posting memes about man’s obsession with missile codes, and how that’s related to NOT knowing where the clitoris is.” – Dr. Freckles
Men want women that tangle with fire … That stand at the gate, you know they can’t wait.
Men want women for the wanting and the hustling, it’s a game of chance, a fancy new groove, she’ll bring the lube and you can’t stop the house from shaking.
Men want women who live in the sky, carrying their timber wolf selves in their pocket, with a rocket, and a chain … one they attach to their slave named Blain.
Men want women that wear leather over the heart, with stern will and stubborn gaze, they braise the pulled pork patty with a love-blow.
Men want women who know about soup and stew and baked bread, they want women that can do math and build a plane and bring you joy, you know this baby.
Men want women who are warriors and queens, that will fix our machines and cook us a nice hot meal.
Men want women who stand real tall, look good at the ball, and have a shot group that’s super small.
Men want women of iron and lace, who carry burdens without care, their pie wins the state fair.
Men want women who stare into Hell, shaking their booty, and ringing that bell …
We want the woman of the forest, hairy legs and shorgon-fluids dripping from her moistness …
We want women to be the pincer movement of spirit, where mother-boys give way to men, and lost socks are found.
“There’s a white-Hitler, and a black-Hitler, Hispanic-Hitler, Jewish-Hitler, Asian-Hitler and many others … even Irish-Hitler … but Irish-Hitler mostly drinks, and has an angry podcast.” – Dr. Freckles
I am declaring a general population scale anger emergency.
I saw 4 boomers stomp down some drog-herder in aisle 3 at WALMART.
I saw a young boy build a flame device, and descuzzlate the great forge.
I saw the burst of fire from those three mountains, that stare at us in the night.
It’s three times worse than what I’m saying here.
The triangle has 3 sides, 3 corners, 3 forms of love – your woman has a golden glove she wears to bed each night!
You live on Planet 3 …
There are 3 ways to fall …
There are 3 ways to go …
There are 3 ways to know you are fucked in a blender suspender …
Your body has 3 holes, into which you can insert chunks of coal … eh Santa?
A time god named Neil, tried to find an easy steal, his heart full of pain, from being around 3 astronauts hanging brains for 3 days … in a steal can … made for man … there and back, sack up man! YOU ARE GOING TO THE MOON!
Last night you had a 3 way with your wife and Ex-wife all because of THREE.
You have 3 seconds until your next stroke …
You have 3 years until you are broke …
There are 3 ways to master a flute …
There are 3 rules inside your mind.
Three means by which to find, a new land, in the sand, not far from ROBOT JAPAN!
THAT HONDA ROBOT HATES ME! (3 times)
3 tunnels in the ground …
3 flares are fired at midnight.
3 sounds shatter the silence.
3 shots rung out, eh JFK?
3 villages glowing in phosphorous …
3 people lay dead.
3 children pledge a vow.
3 years they plan revenge.
3 more graves to be dug.
THAT ASTRONAUT MEME: “It was always a death star …”
“I’m a hermit … you are all so great from a distance … especially if I have a .50 cal Barret … and concertina wire deployed correctly, to channel you.” – Dr. Freckles
“I’ve been naming the deer here, in the woods, as they pass by: ‘Cheese Burger’, ‘Stew’, ‘Pepperoni Pizza’, ‘Meat Ball’, it feels cozy.” – Dr. Freckles
