Posts

Posted on

MR. SCRIBBLES

The “NEWS” from Izvestia (iykyk): zerohedge.com

FRIENDLY RANT:

I need friends ...
friends made of
glowing hot titanium
and if they held your hand
it would turn to ash
in a flash
I wish I had these kinds of friends
friends who could melt people's hands

I grew up
in the time
of whiskey-apes
we ate cat pudding
we wrestled our fears
in the hope
that some NUKE WAR
was near
I wish I had friends
who remember those times
those years
we'd throw back some beers
and dream of being
ATOMIC WARLORDS
with 50 hooker wives
and a million lives
as the stone breaks
these would be cool times
and great friends

I need to tell you ...
I love you.
I love your halitosis.
I love your diseased liver.
I love the fact that you poop blood clots.
You are my honey-time franchise winner.
And with my SKINNER I'll harvest the world
Cuz ... you know.
I love you.

There's this new thing
called water dieting
you rapidly lose weight
and then you die
and then the REAL magic kicks in
as the pounds melt off
as the worms burn those pounds
you lose a lot of weight

I'm on day 3 of the water-diet, 
I've already lost 15 pounds.

I'm feeling woozy though.

people are telling me 
the "water diet" is dangerous ... 
WTAF do they know 

did you know that MOST 
of YOUR MASS is WATER?

why has the weight loss 
industry and other fitness 
edge-lords been lying 
about this 
for so long?

they NEVER talk 
about cutting it, 
they always EMPHASIZE 
having MORE

MORE WATER

What if the SECRET 
to LOSING WEIGHT 
and GAINING MUSCLE 
has always been 
cutting out water?

One  I lose 50 pounds
on the water diet ... 

I'll send you pictures.

Or the coroner will.

I will be
next years
beach body
surprise ...

The EYES will turn
to me ...
From the sea and the spray.

My JUICE BALM
SEAFLOw STYLE
CHEMICAL BUTT
OINTMENTS will
SELL OUT ... soon.

We're going
to the moon.

Water diets are challenging.
All your friends will say you're crazy.
Your family will distance themselves.
They might even call the cops on you.
If you do the water diet.

But I promise you, 
you WILL lose weight.
A lot of weight.
All of it.

My doctor said 
I was MAD for 
doing this water diet.

I asked him: 
"how much 
of your body 
is water?"

This shut him up, 
he froze, 
he had no response.

What I really want to do? 
- focus on my body.

And that means 
drinking NO WATER 
today ... 
none.

None tomorrow too.

My goal: 
a week 
without drinking water, 
and I think I can do it.

Then two weeks.
Then 5.

Some experts 
are coming out 
OPPOSED to water diets.
This is apostasy.
These heretic harlots 
must be STOPPED 
at all cost ...
Even if it means 
we all get herpes ...

"check under your chair", 
as Oprah would say
it's okay
it's herpes

Where it’s headed: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29563

Attendance: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29645

What’s on the MENU: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29639

Dystopian mathematics: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=19704

Price of water (a tale of an economically inferior good): https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29622

I.G.Y. REVISITED ONCE AGAIN SEQUEL: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29617

How is this real?: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29613

Enough time left to watch Doomsday?: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29553

Super El Nino: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29548

Love is: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29707

Guns and problem solving: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29704

Patina of courage: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29700

FANCY EMPIRE: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29721

NEW SCRIBBLES T-SHIRT: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29661

Posted on

MR. SCRIBBLES: a Halloween tale

T-SHIRT: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=29661

Long ago
in a land you know
a man named Rudy
did his duty
fought in a war
but his wife 
was a whore

He had a friend
named Jody
a rock-n-roll roadie
always with HER
using Rudy's bed
one day Jody
shot Rudy in the head

Rudy lay there
cold and limp
but a demon
with great care
from HELL
rang HIS bell
and you could tell
Rudy was gone
so long
Mr. Scribbles is HERE!

And from that day
the children would say
"go away"
"go away"
"try to hide"
"deep inside"
but the story lied

... and SCRIBBLES has arrived ...

Mr. Scribbles
comes in the night
Mr. Scribbles
is ready for a fight

Mr. Scribbles
walks real slow
Mr. Scribbles
knows where you go

Mr. Scribbles
with words unsaid
mean from the streets
eating the dead
it's okay
he's unseen
he'll be visiting
on HALLOWEEN

Mr. Scribbles
lives near the sea
along the shore
hard to the core
bittersweet memories
of every victim's plea

Mr. Scribbles
is 10 feet tall
he'll give you a call
on the phone
when you're alone
and no one knows
the firelight glows
long after
you are gone
the song dies
the flame lies
you will be late
for the charity ball

Mr. Scribbles
he's always nearby
with a sigh
and a curse
he grabs your purse
he steals your phone
and then he's there
sitting on your throne

Mr. Scribbles
he has a strange laugh
it's a gaff
a prank
you think it's okay
but then
the sun goes down
on your last day

Mr. Scribbles
he likes to use knives
taken many lives
brought them
to the dump
like a lump
buried in the fill
and still
he cries
as the world dies
and the flies
and the blood
and with a thud
the hole is damp
he puts out the lamp
and it's "ADIOS CHAMP"

Mr. Scribbles
is tired and sad
he wanders the world
flag unfurled
mind broken
just a token
of regret
you haven't met
yet
yet
yet

Mr. Scribbles
is away by dawn
all gone
forever walk
he never talks
he sits
he stalks
and he waits
another week
another month
another year
rivers of tears
flow by
he never dies
he never lives
he only gives
one last kiss
and an outline
made from chalk

Mr. Scribbles
came from HELL
ringing that bell
that Beelzebub bling
"ding, ding, ding"
goes the doorbell
he smiles real nice
he gives great advice
he wants to come in
he'll punish
your sins

Mr. Scribbles
is here for pain
he's slain
more than a few
left them
in the swamp
slowly turning
churning
to goo
a slew
of freaks
with cheeks red
nowhere to tread
just missed
presumed deceased
broke the lease
on the house
"what a louse"
the landlord said

don't look behind
don't look ahead
don't look for help
hear what I said

he's not afraid
he has no loss
he's the boss
of the end
he's a friend
to the bat
and the rat
and the spade

Mr. Scribbles
drives a nice van
Mr. Scribbles
eats from a can

Mr. Scribbles
feels the URGE
Mr. Scribbles
is going to splurge

Mr. Scribbles
grinds his teeth
Mr. Scribbles
is hiding beneath

Mr. Scribbles
eats all day
Mr. Scribbles
has the last say

Mr. Scribbles
is outside your town
Mr. Scribbles
wears a long frown

Mr. Scribbles
carries a bat
Mr. Scribbles
will eat your cat

Mr. Scribbles
had a nice wife
Mr. Scribbles
took her life

Mr. Scribbles
has one yellow eye
Mr. Scribbles
flies through the sky

Mr. Scribbles
hides in plain sight
Mr. Scribbles
is stronger at night

Mr. Scribbles
befriended your mom
Mr. Scribbles
is building a bomb

Mr. Scribbles
does the bad drugs
Mr. Scribbles
has human hair rugs

Mr. Scribbles
really loves SPAM
Mr. Scribbles
did 6 tours in NAM

Mr. Scribbles
has blue hair
Mr. Scribbles
likes to stare

Mr. Scribbles
collects old trash
Mr. Scribbles
will turn you to ash

Mr. Scribbles
fought a bear
Mr. Scribbles
truth or dare?

Mr. Scribbles
is always sad
Mr. Scribbles
knows you've been bad

Mr. Scribbles
makes a racket
Mr. Scribbles
has a skin jacket

Mr. Scribbles
does not lie
Mr. Scribbles
will never die

Mr. Scribbles
camps on the Moon
Mr. Scribbles
is seeing you soon

so try a prayer
to some lame god
say goodbye
to all you trod
pack your bags
you're leaving CRAIG!

don't stop running
he's coming now
he's just
a little late
now he's at
the front gate

he's inside
YOUR ROOM
settling gloom
your last date
Mr. Scribbles
Mr. Scribbles
Mr. Scribbles
brings
your
doom
Posted on

NARRATIVE REMINDER …

This is what’s on the “menu”:

  1. US is waging this war, and the USA represent the “bad guys”.
  2. IRAN is responding to this war, and it is the BAD GUY.

Not on the menu: that this war could be an OP just like COVID. Which means 100% orchestrated bullshit.

Another question: how the FUCK does it benefit Iran to give Israel rest, repair and recuperation time? It doesn’t add up, and the edge lord excuses sound stupid, so they generally don’t discuss this inconvenient fact.