Category: Dr. Freckles

“The Gremlin is the Delorian of Ford Fiestas.” – Dr. Freckles

“If you measured my penis in AR-15s? – it would be 8 hippos in size.” – Dr. Freckles

FACTS MOST DON’T KNOW ABOUT AR-15s:

• they can be used to launch satellites, they are that powerful
• only ancient Egyptian kings had access to them, before 3D printers
• one AR-15 can kill up to 300 billion people

“If ‘space’ is the final frontier? – then it’s also the lamest one.” – Dr. Freckles

“If there’s no more gold at Fort Knox, and the strategic oil reserves are nearly empty, why would we expect there to be cheese in the cheese cave?” – Dr. Freckles

Cheese is a good food for bunkers …

So I just have a hard time believing they’ve been “saving our cheese” for us … it’s not OUR cheese …

In fact: that nasty “Who moved my Cheese?” bullshit corporate cargo cult from 20 years ago was probably the result of this CHEESE bullshit.

https://www.farmlinkproject.org/stories-and-features/cheese-caves-and-food-surpluses-why-the-u-s-government-currently-stores-1-4-billion-lbs-of-cheese

It seems like the government would be storing women’s vaginal yeast by about this time …

“If there’s a government CHEESE CAVE, then shouldn’t there be a government HOOKER CASTLE?” – Dr. Freckles

“When I establish MY CULT, we’ll have these things called ‘cans’ … but they won’t be electro-doodly bullshit, they’ll be boobs … you hold on to your interrogators boobs.” – Dr. Freckles

“JUGS are the key to truth.” – Dr. Freckles

“Those whom the gods are about to destroy, they first make lame.” – Dr. Freckles

“Living a long life is not about ‘positive attitude’, it’s about destiny and punishment.” – Dr. Freckles

“I might be a time traveler, and doomed to drift through the oceans of causality.” – Dr. Freckles

“I watch official NASA films or photos or space movies from Hollywood or space documentaries in the same equal spirit of some Hobbit movie.” – Dr. Freckles

“All horror films are secretly about getting women pregnant.” – Dr. Freckles

“Mental health tip: don’t take mental health advice from random mother fuckers on social media.” – Dr. Freckles