Zero Hedge: HEADLINES
“Art” or Demon: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28472
Some Bad Audio Art Berman … (demon voice)
Couple of choice comments from ART:
- Iran doesn’t care about its people. (the US government cares about Americans? – dumb shit)
- You have to believe the story I just told you. (No, Art, I don’t.)
*** normally, Art’s analysis is decent and unclouded. Even if you ignore the audio anomaly, the analysis here is messy. And his futzing about with the scissors makes him look crazy and distracted. Almost like AI generated “Art”.
“NONSESEN” – this year’s COVFEFE … (butt ass)
SOURCE GERMAN: something SO BIG and HUGE that you can’t stop thinking about it, but when it shows up it’s really a FRENCH BULLDOG, and your family hasn’t had food for 12 weeks, and so it’s stew night … and the Frenchie’s name is “Stu” … and the family doesn’t know this.
I told you no more group emails, but that was its own kind of nonsesen. If you haven't checked, there's a new podcast "Fentanyl Patches" up on the blog and spotify. I have given up on the cage Rumble and YouTube put me in, and I gave up YEARS AGO on the non-ghetto place for people like me, someone who: a) sucks too much to do better OR b) won't ever know besides. Fuck it. Good evening.
This is gonna be one HELL of a SUMMER, and summer doesn't officially start for a couple more weeks. Heat waves, floods, probably giant hail stones, and transcendental bigfoot sightings. Might even feel like the END TIMES, and who knows.
My feelings are: the IRAN war is, in a way, a good sign. I thought we were in POPPING SMOKE phase, where the OP CRAZY goes exponential - but it's still just steep linear. Steep, lots of crazy, but no distinct non-linear behaviors or discontinuities yet. The IRAN war has a "dial" for a reason - "IT" is still not here yet. Maybe it's near, almost here, coming from a planet with no beer. A queer feeling besets ones broken glass heart, so go start your BEACH BLANKET BINGO near the great sargasso sea, and let the flesh eating bacteria have a snack.
Cheers,
Dan
FENTANYL PATCHES (feel better bro?)
MP3: https://planetarystatusreport.com/mp3/20260609_FENTANYL_PATCHES.mp3
HEADLINES: Zero Hedge
What’s going on: in my life, right NOW … no virtue signaling, not too much cringe.
I got a message: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28427
SOUTHWEST WATER CRASH: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28436
Youth and consequences: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28423
You are worse: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28420
Alert – Amateur Sovietologists: https://www.zerohedge.com/political/ex-cia-official-accused-inventing-secret-spy-program-amass-40-million-gold-hoard
CHECKERS:
THE GREAT SOUTHWEST WATER CRASH!
I got a message …
I got a message from the doctors at the HEART INSTITUTE of WESTERN ALABAMA, they told me they needed to replace my heart with an 8 valve system, with a tiny little man inside … shoveling coal … all fucking day, that’s what the docs say.
They said I should care, about the bear, hidden in a lair, there’s a snare … and this is your heart …. and this is your fart … and your pal, Troubled AL, eats cherry tarts …
It’s your heart bro …
It’s time to go …
A little man, with a lunch can, is shoveling coal inside of my chest hole.
I got a message from my dentist … his name is BOB, he’s a slob, he eats cob from a jar in his car … which is also his dental office. He lives in the streets he hunts what he eats. He met a girl … near the broken sea … the land had turned gray, but everything is OKAY with Bob.
He said I needed 5 toothal removal surgeries involving bicycle chains and rebar and broken concrete and an acetylene torch. It seemed careful and well done, and my good friend CHIP who’s very very HIP, came to me in a clip, in his Porsche, eating borscht … I got to the place, Bob numbed my face with a wrench to the back of my head … I was nearly dead … but the teeth were gone, and in their place, on my paralyzed face, were iron and blue, nasty glue, but it looked GREAT …
That’s what the guy said …
When he got back to me …
When he opened his butt up to the universe.
I got a message from my anal surgeon, he’s been fishing for sturgeon. He said it’s time, for the pipe, and the slime, and the camera in my BUTT. Like PIZZA HUT memories gone GREEN, never to be seen by any mean witch named Jan, in a van, with a watch and a smelly crotch … smelly crotch Jan … living in a van … taking time for herself.
My butt surgeon has 9 kinds of knives, each one reveals a different part of your meal in your gut … you food slut … he swears as he tears at your anus … poignant.
The surgery took hours …
No one sent flowers …
I was unable to shower my ass without smoking grass, it was bad …
But I’m better now.
I pee like a cow and eat puppy chow for food … so good … my mood …
I got a message from my CHIROPRACTOR … He said it’s time to come by or my back is gonna die.
His name is ERNIE, he’s on a journey, his mind is covered in sleaze, he has marked up knees … wonder why? Is Ernie gonna die? Is his body full of death? Did you smell his shit breath?
He said my alignment was crooked and my aura was blue-green honey-nut biscuit.
He said my saliva was jelly and my goose was cooked and there’s no way and that’s okay for now … he slaughtered a cow … pulled out the stones … and soon my mind was blown.
I got the fucking message.
I got the fucking message.
I’m eating right, getting ready for the fight.
LATE LAST NIGHT …
MY THERAPIST SLASH HOOKER …
Left me a message …
“Dan, you need to slow down. You need to speed up. You need to let go of your buttercup illusions. You need to work out. You need to lose weight. You have a broken gait and it’s late for your kind of grooving. Take several tablespoons of epson salt, and place it in a small glass … add in squirrel tonsils and other kinds of kale and then BAIL on your burning world. Set SAIL for the NEW HIGHER LIVING somewhere EAST … EAST of ANTARCTICA …”
I got the message.
I got the fucking message.
It’s time for multivitamin lifestyle …
Walk a mile …
Find a dead skunk and building barley bunk for your WIFE, the one in the hole, you left her there, so she’d be eaten by a bear.
I got the message.
Youth and Consequences …
“Youth is devoid of consequences.” – Dr. Freckles
Worse …
“You are worse than you think.” – Dr. Freckles
WHAT is NORMAL?
MP3: https://planetarystatusreport.com/mp3/20260605_WHAT_IS_NORMAL.mp3
LAST DAYS of NORMAL: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28406
Peter Thiel is bugging out: https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/peter-thiel-argentina-billionaire-tax-b2986444.html
NDAA 2027, SECTION 224:
UV radiation and the brain: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11263540/
Fake Wars: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28387
Figured this out: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28371
Fun-gal: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28367
The Future: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28363
Taco meat: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=28354
What is normal?: think about it, then get back to me
- normal isn’t a thing
- the period of history from 1945-2001 was the fluke, for American history
- LIFE is mostly EQUILIBRIUM with intermittent transitions that can be QUITE CRAZY (hence the “punctuation”)
Last days of normal …
Smoky lands
with sandy nights
bloody hands
dunk'n delights
candy cake fright
with clock
and sock
and block
left torn
below the horn
Broken strands
careless coughing
journey's height
well in sight
mountain song pass
out of gas
with stolen hours
and flowers
rough and sour
for the gang
spread
rough
guff
on fire
devour
100 GRAND
in the account
spending spree
jubilee
food and drink
spirits sore
at the stand
checking out
two bags of onions
and a can of meat
what do you think?
Your heart sinks
empties
residue dreams
you leave the store
galore
don't pout or plea
WHAT A CHORE!
kept alone
cut to the bone
hard as stone
bled dry
always HIGH
ever nigh
made from crone
$11.99
It's all fine
ELEVEN NINETY NINE
bottle of turnip wine
blog-meat
under the seat
dried out
saddle taste
don't waste
you found the burger
now cast your fortune
unwind
it's available
for $11.99
Cog-paste? - $11.99
Old-paint flakes? - $11.99
Moldy bread? - $11.99
Blood soup instead? - $11.99
Clem beets? - $11.99
Open bay hornet honey? - $11.99
Eleven Ninety Nine
everything is fine
Eleven Ninety Nine
works every time
Eleven Ninety Nine
for ONE OUNCE of beef
a body buried beneath
the never ending lie
a line to be crossed
and in the lost
with the ghosts
we find more
or most
of what's left