“If COPE were a ticker? – it would be all time highs right now.” – Dr. Freckles
I keep drinking …
I keep thinking,
I want to quit drinking,
but the BOMB keeps ticking,
it’s an alarm clock in my head.
I was DEAD,
when the old whiskey slut sold my kidneys,
“it wasn’t me”, she said.
I was lost,
when my cocaine boss sold loin dressing,
and the magnet freaks kept on a’blessing,
that infernal sphere … hovering in the dark.
So you keep thinking,
you can stop drinking,
but you will still be freaking out.
Your wolf spirit is gone.
Could you hear the INFLUENCE GUY YELL,
at the opening bell,
when turtle wash cowboys SELL SELL SELL.
And your own FRIED FISH DREAMS,
come apart at the seams,
as the elf captain says “we’ve got some turbulence”,
and the bliss barons fall silently in love.
Look out below?
Oh NO …
Look out above.
RFK JR, dumping bodies …
Finally: a solution to the trolley problem …
Just let the fucker on the tracks call their loved ones to say goodbye … if there’s time. Maybe just live stream it … like George Floyd … too close to it? Eh, boyo?
The price we pay …
“Taxes are the price we pay so we can pay more taxes.” – Dr. Freckles

That which slouches towards us …
“The thing that approaches EATS black swans.” – Dr. Freckles
Dear Israel: don’t get any ideas …
BAN G-STRINGS?!?!?
Pre-emptive STRIKES …
“Pre-emptive strikes work LIKE … once.” – Dr. Freckles
Next gold rush …
“What if I told you the next GOLD RUSH is landfills?” – Dr. Freckles
Even if I am skeptical of “predictive programming” as expressed …
What if I told you that thing from the show FALLOUT, where the Brotherhood of Steel collects old tech?
(yeah)
(a version of that is coming to a theater near you)






