“If someone says they don’t have to do it but they’re doing it because they want to, but you pay them? – they don’t want to.” – Dr. Freckles
Full of shit …
“The eye doctor can test you for colon cancer now, because that’s how full of shit most of you are.” – Dr. Freckles
MOAR GOVERNMENT (Merry Fucking Gulf of America)
“Government is a system for pessimists, run by psychopaths, benefiting narcissists.” – Dr. Freckles
“Pessimists, psychopaths and narcissists: those are your THREE BRANCHES of government.” – Dr. Freckles
What do “data centers” and EASTER ISLAND have in common?
“The ‘data center’ build-out has a real EASTER ISLAND feel to it.” – Dr. Freckles
TRUTH is a WEAPON …
“Truth is a weapon in the war of the mind.” – Dr. Freckles
I’ll order it when you learn to spell …
When you find out why …
“When you find out WHY it will be too late to do anything.” – Dr. Freckles
Leave the poor girl alone …
They found something in my colon …
My colo-check friend sent me an email.
Dear Colo-Check Friend:
I and our local jungle shaman inspected your stool sample. It is red and green and black. There are hints of aspen and whey. We can't adjudicate the smell, it is like offal to the senses.
See a doctor friend. See one soon.
Love you,
Eduardo of Ecuador
THIS WAS SHOCKING TO ME!
So I contacted my primary care physician, DOCTOR GRUNKIS of Little Saigon Seattle.
I met my GUY out in that alley behind the Italian-Vietnamese restaurant: “Pho-Get-About-it”. He pulled out his blazer knives and his fireball laser inspectors and other gadgets he hobbled together from shit he bought at NAPA auto parts.
He inserted the plumber’s helper, with camera, into my anal cavity and proceeded to move up the dark chasm to the B-ZONE. Upon arrival, he recorded sights and sounds beyond compare. None could forget the great vistas beyond imagination, like the hollow Earth sequences from those fucking King Kong movies. Like that, but greasier and with more tacos.
He referred me to the RUSSIAN veterinarian that lived in Tacoma.
After that I was transferred to Harborview for butt bleedage and other gumbo.
