Day: June 26, 2023

MP3: https://planetarystatusreport.com/mp3/20230626_STARSHIP_HADES.mp3

Donate: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/doctorfreckles

Zero Hedge: HEADLINES

STARSHIP HADES:

1. Hector, the LANCE-LORD, told the council to prepare. A great SHAKING UP was upon his people and the SAND DIXIES were no longer capable of holding off the STORMS.
2. It was a massive ship, 500 meters long … it had 4 fusion drive engines and protonic afterburners and a liquid ether-matter injector for DARK MATTER space skipping and trans-linear drive.
3. Volxha, the STAR KILLER, was sure the ship would fail, so she built tumbler rockets loaded with lesbian life pods.
4. Hazy planet PEAR …
5. The great cosmic ocean, 20 light years in diameter … with islands of rock and reef … with sea creatures … and multi-generational migrations … SUPER SALMON and WHITE DWARF SHARKS big enough to swallow planets.
6. Bigfoot’s home world …
7. By the 600th year of the journey, the craft had reached 99% the speed of light …
8. EON KINGS WAGE WAR …
9. Time and space fold …
10. Goodbye cosmos, I am beyond you now.

Days without Drinking: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=7758

I take a pill: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=7734

Dating Websites: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=7732

Climate Science: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=7761

Bigfoot:

I stand there in the dark,

chewing bark,

listening to a meadowlark …

And the drinkers and thinkers and hunters chew their cud,

drink their whiskey,

and smoke their MARLBORO CIGARETTES …

And do these intrepid adventures offer me any?

Do they care about the hairy man of the Woods?

Nah …

They mock me …

They mock me in the darkness.

Start a submarine business: https://planetarystatusreport.com/?p=7764

I’m thinking of getting into the submarine business …

I’m gonna rig up some kind of steel barrel with a bottle of oxygen and maybe they get some kind of 3 inch window to peer out of with a light …

And I send those poor souls down to Davy Jones’ Locker …

sensitive question …

If I started a submarine business, taking people to see the dudes that died?

Where they died?

Near the titanic?

Is that insensitive and potentially cursed?

I am at peace.

I’m thinking of sending people to SPACE.

I can rig up a steam rocket using old plastic containers and the boiler from the abandoned school …

I’ll create some kind of capsule out of parts from a CESSNA CITATION and just fire people up to that place in SPACE.

You are building.

I’m thinking of starting a safari business …

I’m not gonna lead the safari, more like I arrange the passage on the ship and give the person fake ID cards, travel papers, maps to special locations, and a fake person to meet once they get to SOMALIA. I think I give them the name a human trafficker and kidnapper, I dunno, he paypals me periodically.

These fine people will sally forth and take on the world with courage, but in the end fall victim to nature, as so often happens in the jungle – and that’s what this is about fucker.

If you start a safari business, you can just dump people in the swamp some place and say “hey man, go safari” …

So you CAN be a TIGER HERO …

Wrestle the snake.

I might start contracting …

I’ll get a hammer and a saw and a drill and one of those back supports. I’ll start packing a lunch for work and buy boots with steel toes …

I’ll wake up early and get to the job site and the whole team will be really happy with me and we’ll become lifelong friends ….

Of course, after a couple weeks they notice that I don’t know what the hell I’m doing …

So I have to set fire to the job site and go underground …

All because I wanted to do the honest work of a contractor.

I’m considering becoming a fisherman.

I would build my boat out of old beer cans and stale dingy parts. I’d find old diesel motors that have been blown out and restore them using thermal lance and arc welders. After de-gunking to core pack, I’ll grease up the main axle and take that vessel OUT to SEA …

I would run tours for people from the city …

I’d say “come out on my boat son-a-bidge …”

We’d take the tides out to Stoove Island, and then linger there, as our boat slowly takes on water …

We’ll dump the old people first, feed them to the sharks that are congregating near our floundering craft …

We toss out the tourists next …

(then my first mate, Old Flick …)

But only IF I were a fisherman …